Be Selfish: Keep Reading To Your Kids

In my home this never stopped. My children are 8 and 11, which means I’ve been reading aloud each night for over ten years. We didn’t plan it that way; it just seemed the natural thing to do. But the more I talk to people, the more I realize how many are missing out on an activity with so many personal benefits, it starts to sound, well, selfish.

What if I could offer you a 30-minute daily activity that helps you:

• set aside your work and the stress of life
• connect with your children
• lower your heart rate and blood pressure
• enjoy some of the greatest stories ever told
• recharge your creativity and ability to think

Much like compounded interest, this small, daily investment adds up to massive benefits over time.

I work a full-time job and get little time with my kids on weekdays. When I do see them we’re often on such different wavelengths it’s hard to connect. Reading aloud calms us all down, brings us together and makes this quality time. It cues their bodies to prepare for sleep (another great advantage, if you have interest in seeing your spouse). I find myself afterward in an entirely different frame of mind: fresher, more playful.

Over 10 years I’ve yielded nearly 1,800 hours of sitting on a couch with each child snuggled next to me, laughing at the humor, repeating the best lines aloud, on edge with suspense, asking “what does that word mean?” and discussing the characters’ lives and the choices they face.

If both kids give this up by, say, age 13, I’ll have netted nearly 4,000 hours, which is 166 24-hr days or nearly 2/3 of a year of my waking life, laughing, connecting, enjoying, learning — through reading.

In the past four years, I’ve read every word on every page of the following books aloud:

• The complete Chronicles of Narnia series, vol. 1–7 (767 pages)
• The complete Harry Potter series, vol. 1–7 (3,407 pages)
• The Hobbit (251 pages)
• A Wrinkle In Time series, vol. 1–4 (646 pages)
• The Percy Jackson Olympians, vol. 1–5, and Heroes of Olympus, vol. 1–3, series (3,000+ pages)
• The Lemony Snicket series, vol. 1–5 of 13 so far, (even more pages)

That’s an incomplete listing. I’ve read some books I’ve always wanted to but never got the chance, some books I never wanted to but really enjoyed, and some books that mysteriously disappeared from our house or Kindle before we could complete them.

Of course, there’s still plenty in it for them:

• It expands their brains—benefitting cognitive development and listening skills.
• It builds their vocabulary and ability to express themselves.
• It teaches them to love reading.

A few years in and you’ve not only granted them lifetime access to the pleasures of literature, you’ve turned them on to the gateway drug to learning.

• We get some of our books from the library, but we also use the Kindle. This can get expensive, but the Kindle has helped us ensure there’s always something on hand to read. As soon as we’re out, we can buy the next volume. You can cut down on cost by buying the complete series of a book. You can also check books out of the library to your Kindle. Most of the books I’ve bought on Kindle have been read repeatedly by my daughter, so I feel it’s not a waste.
• I have a rule that we don’t watch movies made from books until we’ve read them first.
• I try to read above the children’s reading level. You can ask them questions to check their comprehension.
• Most of the time, I am not a “story-time reader”. I think some people are intimidated by “good readers” they might see in a library, or in a classroom, or hear on an audiobook. I don’t often have that level of energy at the end of the day, or at least not at first. The more engaged I am in the book, the better I read. I also find that better writing gives you more energy. But, honestly, you could read quietly, in a dead monotone and your kids wouldn’t really care.
• One of the biggest challenges I had was incorporating my second child to the routine, when he was old enough. It’s hard to find the time (and energy) to read to each kid individually, and a 6-year-old has very different comprehension abilities than the 4-year-old. At first I read books the 4-year-old could understand, but felt I was short-changing my 6-year old by not challenging her. I made a decision then that I’d read to challenge the 6-year-old, even if my 4-year-old got less out of it. He would bounce around, fidget a lot, initially, but he was still listening, and when I questioned him, his comprehension was pretty good. If he needed to walk away and play for a while, then come back, that was fine. We’ve read together ever since.
• Today my kids both multi-task as they listen: they draw, doodle, make a craft, play with Legos. This helps them focus on the story.
• We skip Saturdays for the most part, sometimes Fridays too.
• Homework starts to pose a time management challenge as kids get older. We nearly always manage to get some reading in, though, and I find reading time provides some motivation for getting homework done.

I encourage you to try this, and when you do please let me know how it goes for you. This is something I’d like to share with as many people as possible in this new year, because many people don’t do it, and I’m convinced it can greatly improve their lives and, (coincidentally) the lives of their children.

15 or 30 minutes per day isn’t a super-human achievement; it’s a fairly modest investment, and, once you get going, self-perpetuating. Exercise gurus recommend keeping a peer group around to keep you motivated. Reading aloud has a built-in peer group that can be quite insistent (at times belligerent) about making sure you don’t miss a day.

Good luck, and happy reading.
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Greg Weinger PDX technologist, writes of himself, “Fatherhood, Software and Books, Oh my!” | Follow Greg on Twitter ‪@gweinger‪ ‬

This piece was reprinted by EmpathyEducates with permission or license. We thank the Author, Greg Weinger for his kindness and for sharing his family love of learning. May we all create our “Good luck, and happy reading.”